health journal log posted just before heading into ER
--3/4
mon woke up w another headache, feeling out of sorts uncomfortable restless in myriad of ways: sheets were all wrong (no matter what i did - never happens), felt too warm, air felt stagnant. nerves overstimulated, everything was irritating.
began day with more numbing up/down L arm and leg. like a hangover, i'm more sensitive to light and sound, sounds are tinnier/louder, road bumps more irritating, all irritants triggering the inflammation, grating on frazzled nerves.
--3/5
3rd maybe 4th day in row waking w headache and hint dizzy on forward bends, today so far breathing easier than days prior, good enough to feel ready to do an easy lite gym visit, not push it.
clostrophobic sensations in car force me to open 2 windows in rain, turn up the AC on neck and make it way cooler than usual.
static is hard to adapt to. and that's what it generally feels like 'static' in all tissues. it's like how you lose your radio program in a parking garage, trying to listen through worsening static causes a type of discomfort frustration anxiety where you need to turn it off to stay sane.
if this chronic inflammation cascading into neuropathy, spreading static across neural tissue affecting many functions of body mind emotions, is any hint of the near future. i can feel my energy and patience to do the stuff I like doing like research and writing are waning, so had to get a medical directive in order in case this broad array of issues takes turns i can't deal with.
gene/enzymes like MTHFR can determine your unique metabolism thus related disorders, what drugs will do you more harm, and in my view can determine your mental emotional character personality and quirks. MTHFR enzyme dysfunction can impact your ability to optimally get oxygen from air, nutrient from food, signals firing between brain and tissues related to major functions, blood vessel health, fine motor skills, sensitivities to pain and other sensory inputs.
today's headache/fever w twinge aches in left breast and under L earlobe ebbs and flows, was bad in the gym lot, as was 'suffocation/clostrophic' discomfort and the need for more cool air, so went to get a drink and it was all 90% gone within 30min so returned to gym to lift weights on machines as i do once/wk.
note: during the rain all was high tide in the body/brain, as the storm passed, so did the inflammation storm inside me. could be pure coincidence, but noted.
--3/6
note: after 3/5 tues workout noticed extra loud high pitch ringing in ears (its as if last two workouts triggered side fx that night and next day)
the breathing hurdle, suffocation and clostrophobic sensations and reflux may be a key contributor to some of it. now open to treat for gas reflux.
feeling claustrophobic in car on overcast rainy day if windows shut, driving into the 2nd basement underground parking is impossible today, can't do it. unpleasant to feel 'trapped' in this way.
10min on my feet waiting for drink at cafe; tremendous level of upper back pain.
--3/7
sunglasses, hat, coat, seatbelt, stop n go traffic in opposite direction, traffic stacking up tight at extended stoplight. all exacerbate sense of suffocation/phobia/anxiety.
gut more ok, but head/balance feels 10% off.
blend of mild pressure type ache in head but not a headache, low grade dizzy, trying to not turn head quickly, head feels borderline, on brink of dizzy spell.
driving to a free Fremont workshop felt too risky/undesirable and there is no way i would be able to focus if i did arrive, too challenging, so had to abort. sitting at a laptop seems the safest 'least challenging' breathing/head/motion activity.
fast walk job "glided gingerly" 25 yards x3 to test the toe joint, see if it can handle it. [it was stiff/achy for rest of week, but not unbearable if that helps and doesnt damage tissues, will tell rehab team working on the toes].
icy/hot tingly numbing L shoulder top and armpit spot, down forearm to thumb, down L leg roughly along IT band. .
--3/9
fri was relatively ok day, head balance stable, no headache no feeling unstable. most other days last 3 weeks felt borderline. i'll take what i can.
generally, some days can sit for hours with bearable upper backache, but after 5-10min on feet get tremendous upper back pain.
sat. hint of am headache in bed after some TV above temple L and spot on back L skull on bone knob. [note: begin to wonder if how i prop up the bottom back of head to watch tv is contributing to this, so re-adapted the night of 3/15]
--3/11
when you don't feel well in your upper half torso, unsure of your balance, with rolling headache for days, left side is twitchy shaky with more numbing, pain in upper half of back, nerves/patience on edge, forgetful, anxiety/phobias more magnified, all of it overwhelms the mindset/confidence beyond the power of the mind to where all you want to do is 'nothing that you don't want to do'.
in other words if all I want to do is read books or watch videos I like - its all this half-ok energy is able to handle, so that's all i do on the days that feel half-ok vs things that rattle my nerves or are challenging or have been fruitless to date ie jobhunt, socializing or dating etc.
-- 3/12 - 3/15
more of the same.
--3/16
getting more forgetful, more numb, more unsure, more unsettling.
called the advisor nurse at insurance. he had to ask what i was feeling...
i said i was diagnosed with neuropathy and nerve damage which i've known for 15 years, that CT scans were ordered, but how i had a vertigo episode 2 weeks ago, and have myriad of freaky symptoms over 3 weeks, incl extra intense muscle twitching, shaking/trembling, pains/aches that come/go incl in both breasts/chest from lowest rib to highest ribs, said two nights ago i had a killer back of head/neck headache with whole body trembling, could not sleep at all, twitching/cramps and louder ringing since, when i took baby aspirin the trembling and headache dissipated in 10 min and body relaxed as if blood flow restored and finally got to sleep.
said i dont feel ok to do much, like i could blitz out, have felt this way for weeks, it comes/goes, so spending day taking walks and hydrating, but thought i should get his permission to get vitals checked at urgent care.
i mentioned feeling clostrophobic in various ways and more forgetful/confused/unaware of what i'm doing or did, like unsure if i took a pill or not, and couldn't recall the middle two numbers of my SSN to type in the menu to get to the nurse (which is ingrained into deep memory drilled into me in bootcamp).
nurse said, due to forgetful and the rest, he advised it could be cardiological or neurological and to get myself to ER instead as they are far more equipped to handle such, that urgent care is for minor bandaid stuff. advised i ask someone to drive.
ps. today i also left house with zipper down (never ever happens).
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